What’s the #1 thing everyone should do tomorrow to kickstart their efforts to overcome pornography viewing?
I’m often asked what the most important step is to overcome a pornography viewing habit. I used to think the most consequential step was the most important but I’ve changed my mind. I think the most important step you can take is the step that will get you started (I’ll cover what that step is in a minute). Old habits are broken and new habits started with simple, single steps.
Chinese philosopher Lao Tzu famously said, “The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.” If that first step seems too difficult it isn’t taken and the journey never begins. So instead of focusing on the most impactful step, I think you’re better off starting with an easy step that gets you started. Once you take the first step the next steps become a lot easier. Starting the journey is harder than continuing the journey.
So, if you’re struggling with porn and are ready to stop, what’s the number one step to take?
Acknowledge every temptation in a way that takes personal responsibility.
Here are some examples:
“I want to view porn.”
“I want to view and do.”
” I really want to watch porn videos.”
Recite the temptation exactly as it comes to you but make sure you preface it with “I want….” The I want means you’re taking responsibility and accountability so you’ll be less likely to rationalize. Acknowledging the temptation does more than just give you personal responsibility. When you insert “acknowledge” between stimulus and response, you move the processing of the temptation from your reactive brain (limbic system often referred to as the reptilian brain) to your logical brain (prefrontal cortex).
Now instead of reacting immediately to the temptation by viewing, your logical brain can weigh the consequences and choose an alternative action. You’ve also started the journey with a single step and can more easily take the next steps. To discover the other steps, check out the Power Over Pornography book at freebook.poweroverpornography.com. Follow this and the other steps and you’ll overcome pornography viewing and experience the freedom it brings within days.